A little late, but I’m leaving soon. And yet, I am currently back at QU writing this. I came back for one last OL thing and I swear this is my last time. (LOL) All my friends have realized that I’m leaving, and that emotion is starting to dawn on me. Everything I did and I saw, I kind of thought “Hmmm, the last time this” and “the last time that”.
The last time that I will ever see my friends in person.
The last time that I would crash on their couches from a late night.
The last time we would share laughs in each other’s rooms or company.
Until Spring semester of course.
Instead of writing a separation letter, I had separation conversations. You can only say so much in a letter, but within a conversation, there’s opportunity to become an open book. With my mom, we would talk about how life is going to be different there and how she believes that I should buy takeout because I can’t cook for myself. I can tell for myself, my mom hates the idea that I’m going because I am going to be far from her. It’s going to be a big adjustment for her because now I’m not an hour and a half away from anymore. The only way she can actually see me is through a FaceTime call. She was very adamant about not wanting to me travel unless it was for family. My response, “God forbid I die, but at least I was doing something I love.” Trust and believe that she is planning herself a trip to come see me even though I’m not co-signing the idea.
With my friends, they’re all telling me how I’m so lucky and how some of them wished they’ve would’ve done the same. In the small separation conversations that I have had with them, some have told me to ask them anything because of their experiences abroad, some not wanting me to leave, and all of them making sure that I call.
During the workshops, we talked about the separation letter being this sentimental thing, but I just could not do it. I feel like I separated from so many things, such as work, school, and family. I feel like I had those sentimental experiences of separation convos in those settings. For example, I had an experience at work. For the remainder of the summer, I earned a job at Bloomingdale’s. So when I told them that I was leaving, it was actually surprising how welcoming they were to me leaving. They told me to be safe and I was welcomed back. One of my co-workers, Amber, told me places I should visit in London since she went last year before graduating high school.
I would consider my abroad experience successful if as long as I can say I had fun. I know there are going to be moments when I’m like I’m over this, but I want to go back saying I had fun. I’m not one of those people that say “I can’t wait to go clubbing!” or “ I must go to Oktoberfest”.I just simply want to have fun. I am ready for the unexpected, but the good unexpected things. Not the bad unexpected things such as getting pick pocketed or getting caught up in something I shouldn’t be in. Other than that, I’m ready. I’m ready to take this all in. I want to enter this experience being more open and aware. Since my school is an actual campus, I kind of plan on being involved. This will help me embrace the new sense of diversity that I am encountering. It will help me to make incredible local friends possibly. Till then I wait for Tuesday…..